r/nba NBA 14d ago Doot 🎵 Doot 1 Silver 4 Wholesome 2 All-Seeing Upvote 1 Helpful 2 Press F 1

[Charania] The Boston Celtics have suspended head coach Ime Udoka for the entire 2022-23 season. News

https://twitter.com/ShamsCharania/status/1573120684951310337
16.4k Upvotes

3.8k

u/416_647 Raptors 14d ago

"I'm aware of the effect I have on women yes"

802

u/dwide_k_shrude Warriors 14d ago

“Hi Ime, you wanted me.”

331

u/acroasmun 14d ago

“Yes Ime, you wanted me”

233

u/lunabagel28 14d ago

Idris Elba, but also applies to ime udoka, serge ibaka, and masai ujiri

16

u/DLottchula Thunder 13d ago

Ibaka is follow by my mom grandma and a few aunt's on IG

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u/Saadiusrex [CLE] Sasha Pavlovic 14d ago

What are Masai's credentials here?

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u/MrHolden 76ers 14d ago Wholesome Doot 🎵 Doot

he should've just whacked off

2.7k

u/free_kark Raptors 14d ago

Ya be more like Doc

1.1k

u/TallStephen 76ers 14d ago edited 14d ago

Things I never thought I’d hear in my lifetime for 200, Alex

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u/[deleted] 14d ago

[deleted]

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u/notmoleliza Warriors 14d ago

Those are rookie numbers

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u/WJMMusic Nets 14d ago

Cock Rivers

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u/daeve Hawks 14d ago

true role model

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u/Deschain_1919 Celtics 14d ago

Or banged his incredibly hot fiance

431

u/goblin_welder 14d ago

I’d bang his hot fiance

362

u/a_fuckin_samsquanch 14d ago

Well... You probably can now. Assuming you're incredibly handsome, and an athlete, and rich.

599

u/bobswowaccount Spurs 14d ago

Maybe she veers the other way after this. Maybe she starts looking for the Costanzas of the world like Marisa Tomei.

238

u/[deleted] 14d ago

[deleted]

170

u/VintageBaguette Warriors 14d ago

Wait, no. I'll have chicken salad, on rye, untoasted with a side of potato salad.

...

And a cup of tea!

76

u/B_Boudreaux Pelicans 14d ago

Chicken salad's not the opposite of tuna. Salmon is the opposite of tuna, because salmon swim against the current, while the tuna swim with it

36

u/swbf_ 14d ago

Good for the tuna 🫠

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u/BillJackaus 14d ago

George Costanza new head coach of the Celtics confirmed.

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u/larrylegend33goat [NBA] Rudy Gobert 14d ago

IT'S THE SUMMER OF GEORGE 🐝

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u/Doc_McPuffins_ Lakers 14d ago

Celtics call George's home phone

https://youtu.be/JpqIbg0AQ7k

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u/Mario_Prime510 Warriors 14d ago

How dare you! Marisa Tomei is a lovely woman!

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u/bobswowaccount Spurs 14d ago

lol I thought about re-wording that part but said fuck it.

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u/Crookz_O Mavericks 14d ago

Believe it or not, suspension.

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u/BillyBean11111 San Francisco Warriors 14d ago

strange has an allure that familiar does not

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u/ThePhattestOne Wizards 14d ago

She's nia longer his fiance

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u/Zloggt Bulls 14d ago

You can’t keep secrets fully safe with others.

Well, except Rosie Palms. She’ll never tell a soul!

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u/Harleytk24 Lakers 14d ago Wholesome All-Seeing Upvote I'd Like to Thank...

Post nut clarity is hitting real different

3.2k

u/[deleted] 14d ago edited 13d ago

[deleted]

761

u/elon42069 Rockets 14d ago

This mfer is on Alcatraz

482

u/dratini67 Warriors 14d ago

Alcatrass

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u/soeffed Clippers 14d ago

This is more like post nut despair

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u/TallStephen 76ers 14d ago

Speak for yourself. Now people can stop talking about (checks notes) Doc River’s twitter porn thing

260

u/kerblamophobe Warriors 14d ago

Doc's liking porn on Twitter ain't got nothing on this staffer banging mofo

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u/TallStephen 76ers 14d ago

…exactly

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u/[deleted] 14d ago

[deleted]

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u/GrayBox1313 14d ago

In a way, suspension is worse. No other teams can talk to him without team permission. He’s not getting paid. He’s in complete limbo.

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u/PooperJackson 14d ago

Deshaun watson assaults 20 women, takes a year vacation and then signs the largest guaranteed contract in NFL history.

justice was.. served?

but don't worry, the Browns donated 2 million to charities to prevent sexual assault.

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u/rasherdk Trail Blazers 14d ago

2 million to prevent sexual assault, and 230 million to benefit sexual assault.

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u/[deleted] 14d ago

[deleted]

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u/Remote-Picture-8341 Rockets 14d ago

Hes defo still gonna get a job if not with the Celtics another team.

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u/Otroroboto 14d ago

I’m going to laugh my ass off if this ends with him as Pop’s successor in San Antonio.

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u/Jakedasnake28 14d ago edited 13d ago

I can already picture Charles Barkley cracking jokes about how the San Antonio women aren't Ime Udoka's type

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u/dvelasco-1397 Nuggets 14d ago

Might be the only thing that'll keep Chuck from fucking off to play golf

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u/BabaBrody 76ers 14d ago

Harden will take Ime to the strip club and tell him it's an office happy hour, let him mingle all night.

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u/BlazeBloom [POR] Eric Maynor 14d ago

The Celtics' month of nightmares continues.

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u/HailKyrie [BOS] Marcus Smart 14d ago

Been several months of nightmares

347

u/noknownallergies Timberwolves 14d ago

What else happened? Ya’ll got Brogdon for a sack of doorknobs. That’s about all I heard about

526

u/HailKyrie [BOS] Marcus Smart 14d ago

Danilo ACL and Rob meniscus clean up plus we lost in the finals I mean

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u/noknownallergies Timberwolves 14d ago

Man….I would love to lose in the finals. I get it tho, sorry for the rough summer. I hope time lord comes back strong

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u/Marcusmemers Warriors 14d ago Silver Helpful

Bro fumbled 2 rings in 1 year

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u/SlamJamGlanda Pacers 14d ago

Allegedly Nia Long had no intentions of marrying. I mean they’ve been engaged for 8 years. But yeah your point is accurate nonetheless

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u/jagaaaaaaaaaaaan 14d ago

Probably because she could tell he had no intentions of marrying lol.

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u/KaptainKhorisma 14d ago

yo, i'm new to this sub and you guys are funny as fuck.

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u/athriren Warriors 14d ago

yeah i lurk because the banter is top shelf.

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u/SaveHogwarts Celtics 14d ago

More is going to come out.

This leak and story is missing one important detail.

5.3k

u/VVVVagabond Celtics 14d ago

The woman is 100% the wife of a high ranking member of the org. This seems overly harsh to the point where it feels personal.

3.3k

u/SleepyEel [OKC] Josh Giddey 14d ago edited 14d ago

If he fucked an executive's wife it should be personal

2.3k

u/yoshidawg93 Hawks 14d ago

This. If he slept with an executive’s wife, that executive has every reason to wish Udoka never coaches another game for the Celtics.

6.5k

u/Otroroboto 14d ago Silver Gold All-Seeing Upvote Starstruck Spit-take

Why? Firing him just frees up more of his time to fuck his wife.

1.1k

u/choose_uh_username 76ers 14d ago

That VP is every trader on Wallstreetbets

674

u/Kiddierose Mavericks 14d ago

What my wife and her boyfriend do is none of my business.

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u/tigernet_1994 14d ago

Keep my wife's name out of your fqing mouth! :)

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u/shish-kebab Heat 14d ago edited 14d ago

Nah it's was a subordinate. People forgot a key point: Timing, with the Robert sarver thing just getting a conclusion. And if you look back couple of year back Cuban got into muddy water too. With Sarver setting a precedent of team owner having to sell, no GM or Owner gonna mess with sexual misconduct right now. He fcked someone he had power over, lets say the team close an eye on it. Later the female employee leak everything and say she was promised a promotion or something in exchange of sexual favor. Bam now Celtics are the new Mavs and Suns and the whole building come crashing down. They had to address this asap with an action that would indicate that they wont tolerate that kind of thing, don't forget one thing there is always a starting point. If they let him do whatever he want, another gonna do it.

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u/kentalaska [MIL] Brian Winters 14d ago

At any company I’ve ever worked for if a supervisor had a relationship with an employee below them in the company there would be an investigation and they’d be terminated. A year suspension sounds like a lot, but I had a manager terminated just for pursuing a relationship with an employee.

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u/JC_Frost Bulls 14d ago

At my work, one shift's manager was passed on for a promotion to a higher role because she's dating an employee on another shift, and the promotion would put her on his chain of command. Pretty standard stuff

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u/chuckvsthelife Kings 14d ago

The only reason he’s not fired is because of who he is I feel like.

It’ll be unsurprising if he resigns.

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u/Ecstatic-Coach Nets 14d ago

They tried to impeach (or did impeach) a US President for this. CNN fired their CEO. Michigan got rid of their university president.

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u/Jon_Snow_1887 14d ago

Well they did impeach Clinton, but it was for lying in the investigation. The famous quote is him saying “I did not have sexual relations with that woman.”

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u/dproma 14d ago

So why not just fire him? One year suspension makes no sense.

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u/djbayko 14d ago

They don't want to pay the entire contract. They're probably negotiating a buy out with Udoka and his agent, but they couldn't come to an agreement quickly enough for an announcement today. So all they can do is suspend him for a year.

Notice that the press release says that a decision on his future beyond this season is yet to be determined. In other words, he gone.

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u/RobtheNavigator Timberwolves 14d ago

Generally if you are fired for-cause you don't get a buyout.

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u/Low-Exam1208 Nets 14d ago

Covering their ass in case of a lawsuit

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u/MadVillain1 Toronto Huskies 14d ago

Lawsuit from whom, theres stages before termination like a suspension but violation of company policy and code of ethics are fireable offences.

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u/lets_talk_basketball 14d ago

Am I naive for thinking if he resigns now a team will 100% give him a shot either mid season or in the summer?

1.4k

u/pinoy_cash 14d ago

Nah you know Jeannie Buss wants him

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u/zetcetera 14d ago

He’ll go into her office and see the black casting couch

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u/rr196 [NYK] Jeremy Lin 14d ago

Put me in, coach

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u/sexygodzilla Supersonics 14d ago

"What's with the camcorder, Jeannie?"

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u/[deleted] 14d ago

"Oh this? That's nothing. Now why don't you just go make yourself comfortable and I will make some of my famous pineapple juice."

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u/MildlyCoherent 14d ago

Nah you’re right. Deshaun Watson got another job and what he did was way worse than what we’ve heard here.

Of course, if the details of Ime’s case make it a lot worse, all bets are off the table.

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u/lets_talk_basketball 14d ago

Well yea.. Deshaun was non consensual. From the jump this was deemed as something that was consensual.. As long as it wasn't him forcing himself on someone, or coercing someone, he'll be fine

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u/UnearthlyDinosaur Lakers 14d ago

Nets would fire Nash and scoop in to grab Udoka.

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u/Srikkk Warriors 14d ago

Woj got sniped on his own leak lmao

1.1k

u/lopea182 Heat 14d ago

Too busy photoshopping his face on the Woj Bomb™️ graphic.

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u/Raptorsthrowaway1 14d ago

The interface on his Wojberry phone is just not fast enough

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u/TallStephen 76ers 14d ago Silver

Woj high key is just the adult form of Randall from Recess

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u/Phoebesdaddy Bucks 14d ago

Solid analogy

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u/HatsOnTheBeach Supersonics 14d ago

Woj is cooked

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u/shaheedmalik Nets 14d ago

Shams > Clams.

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u/gucci-legend [SEA] Patrick Ewing 14d ago

Woj is done, and not just on Twitter

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u/PhillyFreezer_ [PHI] Eric Snow 14d ago

The Celtics made an official statement dude, Shams got the email like every other reporter

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u/KobeFadeaway248 Lakers 14d ago

He slept with way more than just a couple execs wives.

1.5k

u/Nug-Badger :yc-1: Yacht Club 14d ago

What if he slept with a players wife lol

900

u/astronomybovine 14d ago

Or a player’s mom?

578

u/clai44 14d ago

At the same time?

286

u/Jeriahswillgdp 14d ago

🎶 At the same damn time, at the same damn time. 🎶

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u/WJMMusic Nets 14d ago

On the phone cooking dope

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u/slightlyhigh7 14d ago

SELLIN WHITE SELLIN MID

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u/worf2picardfor3 Celtics 14d ago

Delonte? Is that you?

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u/astronomybovine 14d ago

They got traditions in Boston.

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u/zitjuice 14d ago

BABY, I call this position "The Delonte"

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u/zeezee2k Knicks 14d ago

Derek Fisher?

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u/Walrus-Ready 14d ago

I don't think it would be a big deal if he slept with Fisher

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u/packofstraycats Mavericks 14d ago

It would probably be newsworthy

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u/Mikes_Movies_ Celtics 14d ago

Or a player?

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u/Cacklemoore OKC Hornets 14d ago

It feels like this has gotta be the case, right? Like what exactly is the magnitude here, Tiger Woods level?

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u/allknowerofknowing Bulls 14d ago

lol ime is a legitimate crazy person if he was bumping uglies with multiple execs' wives. Who the fuck fucks not just one of their boss's wife, but multiple.

If true, mans really thought he was living on a real life brazzers set

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u/maethlin Warriors 14d ago

Where the fuck are people getting this?

I'm not saying it didn't happen... but I feel really out of the loop because I keep seeing everything from "banging random employee" to "banging multiple execs wives" lol

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u/CrippleJedi Celtics 14d ago

Also slept with every girl on Boston's cheerleaders team, it's all coming out now.

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u/pineapplecheesepizza 14d ago

they were all stuck in the washing machine, he just had to

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u/sexygodzilla Supersonics 14d ago

Step coach what are you doing?

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u/TheMagicalLlama Warriors 14d ago

I’m dying at This whole thread lmfao. Your psychoanalyzing the guys hypothetical mindset when he hypothetically banged his multiple execs wives

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u/1998TimThomas Bucks 14d ago

Trainer got stuck in the dryer

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u/illyxpink Bulls 14d ago

He really went from taking the Celtics to the finals to this

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u/Zloggt Bulls 14d ago

This makes me wonder: when did this affair happen?

Just recently? In the regular season? During the playoffs? I’m not sure (and I cannot assume), but either way, the man must have been keeping it a big secret all this time.

I can only imagine and how they managed to find out about this (and what happened immediately after)…

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u/BillievDat 14d ago

Of course this comes out after I place a bet on Udoka for Coach of the Year...

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u/SgtMeepMoop 14d ago

Shoulda placed it on city boy of the year

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u/arenasfan00 [SAC] De'Aaron Fox 14d ago

It should void

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u/FormerFetus2 14d ago

bet the under on the Celtics win total to even it out lmaooooo

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u/RowBoatCop1 [LAC] Patrick Beverley 14d ago

So who did he bang?

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u/512165381 14d ago

Angela, Pamela, Sandra and Rita

Monica Erica Tina Mary Jessica

Jump up and down and move it all around Shake your head to the sound Put your hand on the ground Take one step left and one step right

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u/samsab Hornets 14d ago

A little bit of [deleted] in my life, a little bit of [removed] by my side

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u/RNGcooks 76ers 14d ago

Mods I wanna gossip with my boys :(

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u/george_costanza1234 Warriors 14d ago

The one time the mods enforce anything in this sub lmao

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u/Balls_of_Adamanthium Warriors 14d ago

Surely he’s done in Boston.

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u/Chadwiko Celtics 14d ago

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u/throwaway4127RB 14d ago

Man should just resign and start with a new team. Plenty of teams would love to have him.

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u/bachataman 14d ago edited 14d ago

Depends on if he still gets paid while suspended. He's not going to resign and lose the money the celtics owe him. He can just wait for them to fire him while he chills

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u/OhRThey Celtics 14d ago

Yes exactly, I doubt he will get paid this year but still has multiple years left on his contract. They will probably work out some kind of settlement but I bet the C’s ownership are exploring all exit options.

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u/bongomcgee 14d ago

The line about “a decision on his future will be made at a later date” all but seals it. They didn’t have to include that

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u/allknowerofknowing Bulls 14d ago

exactly, that means he's 100% done there

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u/cesga_0218 Lakers 14d ago

Probably just waiting for him to resign at some point if it's that serious

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u/1850ChoochGator Trail Blazers 14d ago

Ime already said he isn’t going to resign.

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u/kaprrisch Cavaliers 14d ago

They said violation”s” of team policies.

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u/Kizz3r Raptors 14d ago

If u want someone out for a year u want them gone permanently. The question is do they fire him or does he resign

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u/FilipinooFlash 14d ago

He will probably negotiate a payout with them and be released before the suspension finishes

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u/Dongsquad420BlazeIt [LAL] Kobe Bryant 14d ago

100%. We’ll see which team offers him a job next year though.

46

u/TallanoGoldDigger Lakers 14d ago

The biggest loser (NBA-related) here is Quin Snyder, he's well in line for that Spurs job but now he's got Udoka to worry about

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u/NedFriarson49 14d ago

Udoka doesn't strike me as the big ol' women type

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u/[deleted] 14d ago edited 13d ago

[deleted]

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u/smoltanboi Heat 14d ago

head coach of the cleveland browns

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u/latman Nets 14d ago

No they said it was consensual

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u/Dongsquad420BlazeIt [LAL] Kobe Bryant 14d ago

Can’t teach culture

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u/BatmanHive Lakers 14d ago

Their statement says they will make another decision if he stays beyond this season, I think he's let go.

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u/craigslistaddict 14d ago

or maybe it depends how mazulla does, if he sucks they may go crawling back to udoka.

(well, they'll probably still have more options.)

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u/Neuroxex Bucks 14d ago

What a dumbass. One of thirty jobs. Gets his foot in the door, has an extremely promising first season with a championship contending franchise. Still can't keep his dick in his pants with it all on the line.

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u/JuanG12 Mavericks 14d ago

The fact he did it one year into being head coach is insane. He can’t be that horny.

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u/ktdotnova Spurs 14d ago

The Celtics is like a college blue blood position at a UNC or Kentucky. He literally could have dated anyone else… or just self disclose. He’s entirely at fault here.

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u/Hellstr0m Heat Bandwagon 14d ago

It is pretty crazy when you put it like that. You’d think he’d wait at least a couple years on the job before sleeping around with everyone lol.

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u/desirox Mavericks 14d ago

Yeah he potentially pissed away a very lucrative career for some pussy. He’ll most likely get another chance but it probably won’t be with a team as good as Boston

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u/IndianaBones11 [NJN] Drazen Petrovic 14d ago

If you’re willing to go this far but not fire him it has to be some combination of not wanting to pay him and not wanting him to end up on a competitor

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u/PillsburyToasters Bucks 14d ago

“If you ever feel like cheating, just jack off”

-My college friend

It speaks volumes in this context

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u/[deleted] 14d ago

Goes for all kinds of important life decisions. Think you need a big loan that fancy car? See how you feel after rubbing one out.

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u/haventseenstarwars 14d ago

Instructions unclear rubbed one out in my new fancy car

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u/iladius 14d ago

Wow I can't believe no one thought of that. It's that simple.

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u/alex_song Knicks 14d ago

Longer suspension than Deshaun Watson!??? LOL

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u/jred1026 Celtics 14d ago

in case you were wondering

1 sexual assault = 0.458 NFL games

1 consensual sexual relationship with a coworker = 82 NBA games + playoffs

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u/bile_belcher 14d ago

Bynum got 5 games for murdering a small Puerto Rican man. 80+ games seems very personal.

284

u/Shaved-extremes 14d ago

wait what?? Bynum killed somebody? edit: Nvrmind ur talking about Barrea? lol

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u/maytheforcepeewithu 13d ago

Bynum killed the Lakers

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u/Dr_Tacos_MD Lakers 14d ago

I know you’re not talking about him but Jayson Williams (the nets center) killed his chauffeur, while Bison Dele (aka Brian Williams, Pistons center) was murdered At sea allegedly by his twin brother.

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u/xXTheRacerXx 76ers 14d ago

God damn, RIP to his coaching career in Boston

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u/LukaDoncicBigPP Mavericks 14d ago

What if they win this year lmfao

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u/Guardax Nuggets 14d ago

Then he's super gone

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u/Im__Ron__Burgundy Celtics 14d ago

Start hiring and firing first year head coaches every season at that point.

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u/yf-23 Celtics 14d ago

The Red Sox strategy

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u/shaheedmalik Nets 14d ago Silver Gold Facepalm

Went from Nia Long to Suspended Long.

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u/Obi_Wan_Benobi NBA 14d ago

Terrible, lol.

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u/physz21 Knicks 14d ago

MIA Long*

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u/[deleted] 14d ago

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u/[deleted] 14d ago

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u/[deleted] 14d ago

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u/SwishBreak Nets 14d ago

Only reason that they aren’t firing him is so he can’t go to another team unless he resigns. I can understand it. I don’t think he’ll ever be coaching the Celtics ever again regardless

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u/Low-Exam1208 Nets 14d ago

He gets it

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u/pardonmytardiness 14d ago

To me this reads like he was having consensual sex, but something happened that could leave the Celtics vulnerable to a lawsuit. Maybe he slept with someone and then got them fired/promoted?

The “multiple execs wives” seems like a big leap for what’s been released haha

14

u/orangeblueorangeblue Heat 14d ago

Improper relationship with a subordinate is no bueno in the current environment. Sarver got slammed for allowing sexual harassment, so the Celtics have to take drastic measures to cover themselves. The subordinate has a legitimate claim that she felt pressured to have a relationship with him because refusing could affect her job.

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u/lazzysmalls NBA 14d ago edited 14d ago

Literally just gave up one of the biggest jobs in the league

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u/SharpSwag Lakers 14d ago

We need more details. It just HAS to be more than hooking up with a staff member that was consensual

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u/Floodlkmichigan [MIL] Brook Lopez 14d ago

I think it’s really more about the position it put the Celtics in because it does create a large amount of public, embarrassing, and expensive legal liability for the team.

And if it was someone who worked at the Celtics and who married to an exec, that just shows a complete lack of judgement.

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u/Chadwiko Celtics 14d ago

Man, from the NBA Finals to having our head coach fumbling like this in the space of 3 months is a tough, tough deal.

This sucks.

It's the right call, but it sucks.

202

u/elcapitandemundo Celtics 14d ago

was so hype for this team to build on last season now I’m just worried lmao

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u/BrusselSproutbr00k Celtics 14d ago

I was so looking forward to healthy rob, gallinari, and a more comfortable Ime 🫠

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u/randymagnum433 14d ago

The NBA is the best reality TV show

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u/namblaotie [BOS] Reggie Lewis 14d ago

Imagine working for years in the NBA as an assistant, paying your dues to finally get a head coaching job, then landing a job with a storied franchise, one with a pretty talented & young roster, one that's right there in the sweet spot of having some playoff experience, but still hungry to be coached, then leading that team through a historic regular season turnaround, making it to the NBA Finals, falling short of winning it all, but with some achievable goals and tweaks that could mean winning it all the following season.... to "at least I had sex".

Sometime people just can't be saved from themselves.

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u/Charlie_Wax Warriors 14d ago

Classic Shakespearean downfall.

Greed, ambition, pride, and vanity are a dangerous cocktail!

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u/LoganH1219 14d ago

Post Nut Clarity hitting him like a Hurricane rn

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u/Cul_what Lakers 14d ago

"Im a sick fuck, I like a quick fuck" - Ime "Kanye West" Udoka

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u/Tearz_in_rain 14d ago

This is unprecedented.

A coach being suspended for an entire season.

Why not just fire him?

How is he supposed to come back and coach this team?

If it were for a month, sure.

A year?

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u/Phenom_Mv3 14d ago

Might be their way of forcing him to resign

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u/B00ME 14d ago

Too bad he's not in the NFL, probably would have got a raise.

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u/Current-Promotion-31 14d ago

Delonte west went balls deep on LeBrons mom and the team didn't even sit him for the second half

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u/ddottay Cavaliers 14d ago edited 14d ago

How sad that he chose to cheat on his partner and ruined his career.

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u/SomewhereExisting121 14d ago

He should resign. Putting THIS squad they have built and taken to the finals in jeopardy and facing literally a whole season away from them I don't see how he comes back and gains the respect of the locker room

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